The C. A. T (Completely Asynchronous Timewaster) State Machine

(Proceed to next state unless otherwise specified.)

 1. Sleep
 2. Sleep some more
 3. Yet more sleep
 4. Wake up
 5. Am I being petted? Yes: go to #6, No: go to #13
 6. Purr
 7. Am I sick of being petted? Yes: go to #8, No: go to #5
 8. Am I feeling particularly bitchy? Yes - #9, No - #10
 9. Claw living shit out of petter
10. Is the human pissed off? Yes - #11, No - #12
11. Run away and hide:  Go to 13
12. Get up, look disdainful, exit stage right
13. Am I hungry? Yes-14, No-20
14. Go to food bowl
15. Is there food? Yes-16, No-17
16. Is it the kind of food I like? Yes-19, No-17
17. Make a fuss to get the right food
18. Did it work? Yes-19, No-20
19. Eat food
20. Am I thirsty? Yes-21, No-33
21. Go to water bowl
22. Is there fresh water? Yes-24, No-23
23. Meow until fresh water provided
24. Remember that you like it from the toilet anyway
25. Go to toilet
26. Is water clear? Yes-32, No-27
27. Think awful thoughts about humans
28. Go to washbasin
29. Make a huge fuss
30. Got water from fed up human? Yes-32, No-31
31. Suffer in silence, Go to 33
32. Drink water
33. Do I need to go to the bathroom? Yes-34, No-46
34. Is there a litter tray? Yes-35, No-38
35. Go to litter tray.
36. Use it.
37. Kick some of it out of box onto floor. Go to 46
38. Can I go outside? Yes-40, No-9
39. Do it on the rug. Go to 46
40. Go to door.
41. Meow to be let out.
42. Was door opened within a reasonable time? Yes-43, No-39
43. Exit house.
44. Find secluded space.
45. Do business.
46. Do I want to go hunting? Yes-47, No-53
47. Am I outside? Yes-52, No-48
48. Go to door.
49. Meow to be let out.
50. Was door opened within a reasonable time? Yes-51, No-61
51. Exit house.
52. Hunt anything smaller and weaker than myself.
53. Do I want to go back inside? Yes-57, No-54
54. Find comfortable space
55. Sleep
56. Go to 46
57. Go to door.
58. Meow to be let in.
59. Was door opened within a reasonable time? Yes-43, No-54
60. Enter house.
61. Any trouble worth getting into? Yes-62, No-1
62. Get into trouble.
63. Don't admit it was you. Blame the dog.
64. Go to 1