APPLICATION TO LIVE IN NORTHERN NEW JERSEY


 NAME:__________________________
 Nickname:_____________________

 ADDRESS: ______________________        EXIT #______________________


 ETHNIC BACKGROUND: _______Italian   _______Sicilian ________Jewish

 BACKYARD SMELLS LIKE:
 a)Sewage           b)Sulfur        c)Garbage       d)All of the above

 TOTAL # OF MUSCLE SHIRTS
 a)5 - 10           b)10 - 15       c)15 - 20       d)20 and above

 # OF BON JOVI TOUR SHIRTS
 a)5 - 10           b)10 - 15       c)15 - 20       d)20 and above

 # OF BON JOVI TOUR SHIRTS THAT ARE ALSO MUSCLE SHIRTS
 a)5 - 10           b)10 - 15       c)15 - 20       d)20 and above

 BRAND OF JEANS PREFERRED
 a)Sergio Valente   b)Jordache      c)Sassoon       d)Z. Cavaricci

 PERCENTAGE OF WARDROBE WHICH IS LEATHER
 a)100%             b)95-100%       c)90-95%        d)85-90%

 TOTAL # OF GOLD CHAINS OWNED
 a)10 - 15          b)15 - 20       c)20 - 25       d)25 and above

 # OF GOLD CHAINS WORN AT ONE TIME
 a)5 - 10           b)10 - 15       c)15 - 20       d)20 and above

 APPROXIMATE VALUE OF ALL THIS JEWELRY
 a)$ 5 - $10        b)$10 - $15     c)$15 - $20     d)Stolen

 NUMBER OF APPLICATIONS OF OBSESSION/POLO/DAKAR TO ACHIEVE DESIRED EFFECT
 a)10 - 15          b)15 - 25               c)25 and above

 GOLD CAP ON AT LEAST ONE TOOTH?            YES          NO

 HAIR HEIGHT
 a)6 - 8 Inches     b)8 - 12 Inches  c)1 - 2 feet   d)More than 2 feet

 HAIR PRODUCTS USED AT ANY GIVEN TIME
 a) Hair Spray
 b) Styling Gel
 c) Mouse
 d) Extra Hold Styling Gel
 e) Bondo
 f) Spackle
 g) 40 Weight Oil
 h) Crazy Glue

 AUTOMOBILE OWNED:
 a) IROC Z
 b) Firebird
 c) Camaro
 d) Mustang
  f) Chevette ( You got a f#%*ing problem with it?)

 NUMBER OF INCHES CAR IS OFF THE GROUND
 a)6 - 8 Inches     b)4 -6 Inches   c)2 - 4 Inches  d)Under 2 Inches

 CHARACTERISTICS OF AUTOMOBILE
 a) Gold chain around license plate
 b) Neon lights around license plate
 c) Neon lights under car
 d) Chippendales/Playboy air freshener hanging from rear view mirror
 e) Garter hanging from rear view mirror
 f) Chrome hubcaps
 g) Stick-on window tinting
 h) Stick-on paint splash stickers
 i) Fuzzy dice

 FAVORITE SPORTS TEAM
 a) F#%*ing Giants
 b) F#%*ing Jets
 c) F#%*ing Mets
 d) F#%*ing Yankees
 e) F#%*ing Nets
 f) F#%*ing Knicks
 g) F#%*ing Devils
 h) F#%*ing Rangers
 i) F#%*ing Islanders

 FAVORITE MUSIC
 a) Techno
 b) Rap
 c) Bon Jovi
 d) Bruce Springsteen

 ESSAY QUESTION

 In 100 words or less, Define the term "Yoos Guys"