Selected from recent issues of the Vent (a daily column in the
Atlanta Journal/Constitution).

My husband is overdrawn in the bank acocunt of love.

My rural county tried a school uniform program but had to drop it.
With all that camouflage clothing, we kept losing the kids at recess.

My friend's 6-year-old son was explaining why he tries to avoid
attending the religion class at his private school. "I don't want to
go to heaven," he sighed. "There's just a bunch of old dead people up
there."

You're getting old when getting lucky means you find your car in the
parking lot.

Sign seen on church: "Come inside for a faith lift."

Isn't it amazing what a safe and cautious driver you suddenly become
the moment you realize you left your driver's license at home?

I am a female and I met a true gentleman the other day. He was
standing immediately behind me in a checkout line. I dropped a coin
and he pointed to the spot on the floor where it had rolled so that I
could pick it up.

God must love journalists. After the tradegy of having the judge
dismiss their Paula Jones scandal, we now have the disasters of
bad weather.