Fun Times Of An Absent-Minded Professor

One of the worlds greatest scientists,Prof. Jones was also recognized as the
original absent-minded professor. One day, on board a train, he was
unable to find his ticket. The conductor said, "Take it easy. You'll
find it."

When the conductor returned, our professor still couldn't find the
ticket. The conductor, recognizing the famous scientist, said, "I'm sure
you bought a ticket.  Forget about it."
"You're very kind," he said, "but I must find it, otherwise I won't know
where to get off."


Professor Jones was visiting a ranch out in Texas. He looked at a rope
in his hand and mumbled to himself, "One of the two things -- either
I've found a rope or lost a horse."


Professor Jones(sitting beside his bed with a shoe in his hand): "Now let's
see, am I going to sleep or waking up?"


Friend : "I hear your wife had twins. Were they boys or girls ?"
Professor Jones: "Well, I believe one is a girl and one is a boy, but it may
be the other way around."


Professor Jones and his wife were leaving church.
Professor : "Ha, ha! Who's absent-minded now ? You forgot your umbrella
and left it in church, but I remembered mine and I picked up yours,too."

Wife : "Fine -- but the trouble is, neither you nor I brought an
umbrella to church today!"


One morning as Professor Jones was leaving for the university his wife
told her absent-minded husband, "Don't forget we are moving today.
If you come to this house this afternoon it will be empty."
Predictably he didn't remember until he found the house vacated that
afternoon. He mumbled to himself, "And where was it we were moving to?"
He went out in front of the house and asked a little girl, "Did you see
a moving  van here today ?"

"Yes," she replied.

"Would you know which way it went ?"

She looked up at him and said, "Yes, Daddy, I'll show you."