Bathroom Etiquette for Men  



Take the quiz below. The men will be checking their actions vs. the "correct 
answers" and the female readers will be amused how different the male bathroom 
is different than the "powder rooms" This is psychological amusement, not 
dirty humor. Read it and I'm sure you will agree 

The following is the urinal configuration in a sample men's room. An X above 
the number will indicate "in use." 

      (Sample): 

       |   |   | x |   |   | x |
       | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 |

     (Indicates that urinals 3 and 6 are occupied.) 

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You are to identify correctly, based on urinal etiquette, at which stall 
you are to stand. Good luck! 


      Easy Section

       |   | x |   | x |   |   |
       | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 |

      (Urinals 2 and 4 occupied.) 


Correct answer: 6. It's the ONLY one to go to and every guy instinctively 
knows this. 

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       | x |   |   |   |   |   |
       | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 |

          (Urinal 1 occupied.) 


Correct answer: 6. Stall 5 is acceptable, but you run a greater risk of 
being next to someone who arrives later. 


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      Kind of tricky Section

       |   |   |   |   |   |   |
       | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 |

               (empty) 


Correct answer: 1 or 6. You are tacitly saying, "I don't want anyone 
next to me." 

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       |   | x |   | x |   | x |
       | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 |

         (2, 4 and 6 occupied) 


Correct answer: 1. You're stuck being next to at least ONE guy, so you 
minimize the impact and get a wall on your left. 

NEVER go between TWO guys if you can help it. Exceptions to this are 
stadium restrooms where the herd thunders in. 

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      Subtle, tricky, but important to know Section

       |   | x |   |   | x | x |
       | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 |

       (2, 5 and 6 occupied) 


Correct answer: 4. Believe it or not, 1 and 3 "couples" you with the 
guy in stall 2. And we wouldn't want THAT now, would we? 

This differs from previous question in such a subtle way that the 
nuances cannot be explained. Suffice to say, only we men would 
understand! 


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      VERY tricky indeed Section

       | x | x |   |   | x | x |
       | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 |

         (1, 2, 5 and 6 occupied) 


Correct answer: NONE! You go to the mirror and pretend to comb your hair 
or straighten a tie until the urinals "open up" a bit more. If you have 
to go REAL, REAL BAD, ... use a doored stall. 


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      Other parts of the Unwritten Code of the Urinals: 

While taking care of business, stare at the imaginary "Pee Spot" directly 
in front of you. Do not let your eyes wander about. 

NO Talking, unless it's a good friend... but even then, keep it terse and 
unemotional. This ain't no clubhouse. I don't think I need to tell you, 
absolutely NO touchingof anyone other than yourself. A touch of another's 
elbow is of the highest offense. NO Singing. Period.  Glances are for purposes 
of acknowledgment only "Yeah, I see you there. I will not look again"