9 Limericks


There was a young trollop at Yale,
Who had verses tattooed on her tail;
And on her behind,
For the sake of the blind,
A duplicate version in Braille.
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There was a young girl of Samoa,
Who determined that no man should know her.
One young fellow tried,
But she wriggled aside,
And spilled all the spermatozoa.
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The nastiest fogey alive,
Is a pedophile, by name of Hive.
This awful old letch,
Screws what he can 'catch',
And prefers all his girls under five.
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"No thanks" said a Lobster by post,
When asked to a mid-summer roast,
As he wisely said,
"If you were white bread,
Would you jump at the chance to be toast?"
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There was a young fellow named Sweeney,
Whose girl was a terrible meanie.
The hatch of her snatch,
Had a catch that would latch,
She could only be screwed by Houdini.
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There once was a girl named Beth Berman
Who liked to drink everyone's sperm in.
She said, with a pout,
"This tastes like sauerkraut..
Are you sure that you aren't a German?"
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There once was a fellow named Howard,
Whose large tool was nuclear-powered.
While grabbing some ass,
He reached critical mass;
But think of the girl he deflowered!
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There was a young fellow named Biddle
Whose girl had to teach him to fiddle.
She grabbed hold of his bow,
And said, "If you want to know,
You can try parting my hair in the middle."
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A notorious whore named Miss Hearst
In the weakness of men is well versed.
Reads a sign o'er the head
Of her well-rumpled bed
"The customer always comes first."





Thanks to Paul Benoit